Loyalty, Calling, and Place: Three Words to Revolutionize Your Work Life
Dear Fellow Travelers,
Today we are going to talk about loyalty, mission, and place.
Often, when I conduct research interviews or coaching sessions with individuals who are unsatisfied with their work life, certain themes bubble to the top. Many people recount feeling trapped in the murkiness of a work culture that fails to meet their needs for belonging, recognition, and a sense of purpose. In response, they turn inward, launching an internal war, berating their inability to work harder, do more, and brush off assaults on their dignity by pugnacious colleagues seemingly determined to bring them down. Inside these heated conversations with self, the room shrinks, the microscope zooms in, and the possibilities for new opportunities offered just over the horizon are shut out as the blinds close and consternation transforms into despair.
Such reactions are certainly understandable and warranted, but sitting there in the mud, awash with self-blame, narrows the vision of possibilities and places one's power and loyalty solely in the institution’s camp.
But what if the camera zoomed out, and the pervading questions scrolling across your internal ticker tape changed? Here are three questions to start the metamorphosis.
1 ~ Are you loyal to your mission or institution?
2 ~ What do you feel called to do in this world?
3 ~ Is your current job the best and only place to do this work?
Are You Loyal to Your Mission or Institution?
As a young doctoral student, over twenty years ago, my mentor gave me life-changing advice I have carried sacredly in my back pocket, using it regularly to check my motives and guide my decisions as I navigate the tumultuous road of work. Over lunch one day, she offered the following, “Doro, you are going to have to decide if you are going to be loyal to your institution or your work.”
As academics, many of us are highly specialized, spending decades deep diving into the ocean of our refined expertise, devoting ourselves to checking off the boxes required by our organizations for advancement. However, my mentor challenged that directive, instead encouraging me to be loyal to the work or the mission and then inviting that loyalty to guide me up, across, and even out of a current job or field of study.
For example, perhaps you are a financial advisor, dedicated to growing the economic security of your clients, climbing the corporate ladder to Vice President, guided by a narrow scope that limits your views of an expansive horizon. In that season, your loyalty is to your institution, and such a mindset charges you to walk a well-worn path, unaware there are parallel jobs, intersecting career fields, and invitations to fulfill your mission outside your current position. But here is the catch, in order to peel back the film to reveal such possibilities, you are going to have to switch your loyalties, broadening the scope of what’s imaginable.
What Do You Feel Called To Do In This World?
When I talk with survivors of workplace abuse, there is often a deep dedication to excellence, innovation, and relationship building - leading the survivor to inquire:
How can I make my boss appreciate me and recognize the work I am doing?
How can I convince my institution to try out this new idea that will better serve students?
How can I encourage my belittling colleague to treat me with dignity?
Whereas each of these questions are valid inquiries, if they are posed inside a stagnant or toxic culture, productive answers are likely not forthcoming.
Instead, it can be helpful to flip the script and try on this question instead,
“What do I feel called to do in this world?”
It is quite transformative, actually, when we broaden our questions, we expand our future.
For example, perhaps I feel called to make space for people to tell their stories. I can do that work as an English teacher, a professor, but the possibilities do not stop there. What if I invited storytelling in a marketing firm, an afterschool program, a startup developing a story app, or a non-profit for individuals who are rewriting their narratives after recent incarceration? The options are invigorating!
Is Your Current Job The Best And Only Place To Do The Work You Feel Called To Do?
As overachievers dedicated to your work, over time, unbeknownst to you, blinders get placed upon your face, directing your sightline toward an institutional goal that may or may not align with your personal mission. In addition, a desire to please and self-imposed standards of excellence keep you running on the organization's treadmill, too busy to look up and spy all of the prospects available to you.
But, imagine what would happen if you momentarily slowed down and stared at the sky? Perhaps you would discover that your degrees, expertise, and years of service make you an attractive candidate for jobs adjacent or outside your current field but more in line with your personal mission - jobs that may offer more flexibility, a higher paycheck, and opportunities for you to make your son’s soccer game without berating yourself for working a measly ten hour day.
These are exactly the conversations transpiring in Facebook Groups such as The Professor is Out and Life After Teaching, discussions where professionals are exploring opportunities to live a more manageable, profitable, and lower-stress existence.
And though many people will decide not to leave their current job, the simple act of asking new questions enables you to see the possibilities that await when you examine your loyalties, reflect upon your calling, and expand your vision of all of the places you may belong.
After all, knowledge is power, and options are gold.
Book Talk
This past week, I have read and listened to Pamela Slim’s Body of Work: Finding the Thread that Ties Your Story Together, an evocative read that challenges us to reVISION our definition of career, encouraging us to build a meaningful life instead of a job, reflecting upon the legacy we hope to leave in our wake.
Writing Invitation
Write a list or invite a stream of consciousness where you explore the legacy you hope to leave behind. Then, think about if your current job and circumstance is supporting that vision.
You May Also Want to Check Out:
Being Yourself at Work: Choosing Belonging Over Fitting In
Share Your Thoughts
Click HERE if you have a question about workplace bullying or work cultures that you would like to ask. Each week I will select a reader’s question to post in the newsletter and offer up a thoughtful reflection based on the research. I will also encourage our readers to join in on the conversation too.